1. Give yourself permission to rely on your inner guidance, or instinct, as to what the next step is, as opposed to formulating a mental process to determine it.Read More
Let’s talk about your savings account. Not your retirement account, your savings account. The amount of cash you have on hand right now – your emergency fund, your six to nine months of monthly expenses in the event that something unexpected should happen.
How many of you even want to think about that number because it’s too small or even a big fat zero.
Take a minute to write own the amount of your savings. Even if it is zero, write it down. Take a couple of deep breaths and sit with that number for a minute.
How does it make you feel? What are the two main emotions that you feel as you look at that number?
What is running through your mind? What are you saying to yourself as you look at that number?
Does thinking about the amount in your savings remind you of something that happened in the past that involved great loss, disappointment or a feeling of losing safety and security?
Look at the amount and finish this sentence, “This means I’m a ___________________.”
If you’re like a lot of people, that exercise just made you feel sick. For most people, the dominant emotions associated with their savings account are fear and shame.. These emotions are rooted in a past event, usually in childhood, that caused you to feel unsafe. Sometimes the event is directly associated with money, sometimes it’s not. Regardless, your mind and body have subconsciously tied the event and the feelings associated with it to saving money. Now, whenever you look at your savings account or try to save money, your body starts feeling those same feelings of fear and shame and your mind starts running those toxic thoughts like a soundtrack. This is called the mind-body-money connection. If you have a negative one, your relationship with your savings account is going to be rocky.
To beef up your savings account, you have to clear those past negative associations and allow positivity to permeate. The energy of a healthy, growing savings account is that of safety, restoration and replenishment. In our society, the amount you have saved usually dictates how much freedom you have to take care of you. If you have meager savings, you generally feel trapped in your job, like you don’t have the option to quit, take time off, or sometimes even stick up for yourself if negative situations with your superiors arise.
Most people direct a lot of emotion and attention to their money, or lack of it. In addition, there is a lot written about safety, some people call it an illusion. The truth is, that safety is a feeling. The truth is you can allow that feeling to first exist and then take hold and then expand in your life. As you cultivate this feeling and allow it to grow, your savings account will expand and grow.
Are you the type of person that thinks that if you worry about something you are exerting some sort of control over it? That if you think about and analyze every possible worst case scenario that you are better equipped to deal with them if they actually happen?
I used to be one of these people. I picked up the habit in law school where they told us that if we could anticipate every move the opposing party and the judge was likely to make then we would be more likely to win the case. Although preparation might be a good idea in the courtroom setting, applying it to your life does not work.
In her book Presence, Amy Cuddy destroys the theory that worrying equals success. Her studies show that the more successful a person is, the less anxiety they experience.
Worrying = control = successful outcome is a house built upon the sand, a completely flawed premise. In fact, the opposite is true, the less you worry and the more you trust in the universe's ability to deliver successful outcomes, the more likely you are to experience them. So you can let that mental program go and start to experience the life you were meant to live, a life without anxiety.